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Thursday, 13 September 2012

Fun factory

Today I was reminded why I like my job so much. After getting bogged down in environmental management systems for a while, this week I returned to the parts of the job that are satisfying.
Firstly, I did some colour matching, for a special 12 pencils to be launched soon. Then I got a capital request signed off for a new cutting machine, so I've spent a couple of days specifying that with the supplier and sourcing new bushes at the right size for our new sized products.
Then today, there were some problems with a machine in the factory which was giving everyone trouble to fix. Because it was one that I bought in the first place, I was called to have a look. It's a huge machine, a bulk powder dispensing machine; we load ton bags of clay onto it and it dispenses the required quantity into bags, by feeding the powder up a screw feed into a hopper on some load cells. Once the hopper has reached the correct weight, the clay is dropped through a pipe into a bag below....
Anyway, the backlight on the LCD had blown this morning and in the process had tripped the machine, losing the original settings. So I found myself working though the plc program to reinstate the settings. Very satisfying when I got the thing going again, despite getting covered in china clay!
Don't you just love it when a plan comes together?

Weekend again tomorrow and another busy one for me. Lunch out tomorrow, then pencil heads meeting Saturday, along with the continuing c-art exhibition at the pencil museum. That's on Sunday too, then all to dismantle...

The only thing that I don't like at the moment is how dark the mornings are getting when I get up for work. The air smelled of winter today:(.  

Roll on next summer.......






      



are satisfying.

Tuesday, 11 September 2012

Cold calling

I usually dislike receiving cold calls from people trying to sell me something, although I'm usually polite to the caller who after all is only doing a job to earn money.
Today I did some cold calling of my own; another new experience for me!  It was on a voluntary basis though, not for cash. Went to Rosehill theatre to try and sell tickets for our fundraising evening in aid of the Shakespeare development at the theatre. It will be a good evening I think, with a three course meal, free glass of wine, entertainment and a raffle, all for £15. Plus me and the others waiting on tables!
But i now know what it's like to be a cold caller. It's not easy to do, but I have to say everyone was very polite to me and it made me glad that I'm never rude to the people that call me!

One of the things I am doing prior to the fundraising dinner is a Shakespeare workshop for a weekend. Looking forward to it immensely after last year's successful show at Rosehill where I recited two sonnets on stage. This time we are basing the workshop on The Tempest, which I'm currently reading. The two coaches from last time are returning, thankfully. They are excellent: Bardy and Jenny (David schwimmer's mother-in-law). They normally coach al actors in London, so its a great opportunity for us to get the same coaching.

Better get back to the tempest, need to have it read and re- read before the workshop....

Sunday, 9 September 2012

In control at last...

It's been a good few days. Nice to feel like I am in control of my life again. I say again, but really I mean it's nice to feel in control of my life for the first time ever!

I've been having a bit of a clear out. Packed up loads of clothes and books etc for the charity shop - British heart foundation is my favourite, not only because I know people who have had heart problems, but because they handle donations so well!
Yesterday I loaded the old Volvo with junk from the attic and took it to the council recycling centre. It was only as I took it all out at Flusco tip that I realised what a state the Volvo was in.
It's used principally as a dog vehicle, most of its journeys are spent transporting dogs around the country for the Lakeland Trailhound trust. So the back was covered in dog hair of all kinds, muddy paw prints, sticks, etc. while the front was muddy from boots and littered with rubbish....

So I decided to clean it out. Now did that take a while..... But it was worth it. Looking good!
Which is more than I can say for my nails. A couple of days ago they were beautifully manicured and painted, now they are chipped, broken and filthy!

That's always been one the difficult things in my job. I like being girls, but it's almost impossible to maintain when I am up to my elbows in oil inside a machine, or covered in pigment that gets behind my nails and is impossible to remove!!  A girls engineer/ chemist is just not feasible sometimes.

Talking of being in control, though, I have finally organised a builder to come and sort the rising damp in the living room. Got to keep the value of the house up, you never know.....

So onward and upward. My Sunday lie in is ending soon, and I have lots to do.
Starting with Archie's walk :-)


Thursday, 6 September 2012

End or beginning?

Today I saw my lovely counsellor for the last time. We had a really good chat, without the difficult stuff we covered previously. The nice thing is that she left me her contact details and in a few weeks or so I will be able to make contact as just a friend. She will make a great friend- we have a lot in common, so I am looking forward to going for a walk or two and discussing some of the things we both like and enjoy. And listening to her talk for a change, find out about her life...

I am also very grateful to her for the help she has given me over the last year (almost). She helped to understand how I got to be so depressed and why I had such a mammoth 'breakdown' two years ago.
I have finally got rid of some 30 year old demons, plus some 40 year old ghosts and terrors...
The Rape Crisis team are wonderful and the care they have taken with me this year is so marvellous.  I can't thank them enough and one day I will do some work for them to repay the kindness.

The thought of ending the counselling with the wonderful lady was daunting, but not terrifying as it was a few months ago. I'm OK now. I can't say that I have suddenly become happy, but the optimism I used to have about everything is back and I feel in control of my life at last. No longer do I have ridiculous highs and then devasting lows. The ups and downs are still there, but the amplification is much lower.

So the next stage is the antidepressants. Do I go to the doc and try to reduce the dose? I've not been to the doctor for months, just keep getting repeat prescriptions! But am I ready to go it alone without the meds?  I don't know, but I am ready to try quite soon.  I know it's impossible to just stop taking them, because of the hideous experience I had one weekend in London when I forgot to take the tablets with me. I became dizzy, disorientated, and so bleak and low I was almost ready to throw myself off the hotel roof.  Seriously!

anyway, it was the end of an era today, and also the beginning of another. The next one I hope will be    The start of a better phase of my life. At least now I understand who I am and I am happier in my own skin. My destiny is in my own hands; mine alone. No more relying on others, or waiting for permission to let my life begin......


Life begins at 53  for me.  I have had a good week eating wise. No junk, just healthy stuff and less of it! Been walking more and cross training every evening. Who knows, I might even are up that E-harmony subscription that I dabbled with when I was Ill.

Night night xx

Saturday, 1 September 2012

Weighty blog

Healthy eating started again today.  I have realised that I've put loads of weight on over the past couple of years.
It would be easy to blame the antidepressants that I take: one of the side effects listed is 'increased appetite'! However, I've been on those pills for almost three years now, so I should have got used to the effects by now.  I'm just eating too much and not exercising enough.

I have gained over one and a half stones, which isn't good. I only realised when I started puffing and panting going up the steeper hills!
It's not that I care what I look like, indeed that doesn't matter a bit, to me or anyone else. No- one to care whether I'm fat or thin.  But I like my walking and if I can't do it so well, it's time to do something about it.

So, no more junk food. Longer walks and more cycling. the only downside is that if I get too healthy I may live longer. Bugger!

Was a long day today. The exhibition was quiet; too much time to think. I prefer to keep busy.
It's so great that the schools go back next week though. I will be able to park my car outside my own house again, will be able to go to the post office without the queue being out of the door. Best of all I will be able to go on my favourite walks without meeting hordes of people in the country lanes!

So the new exercise regime will start with a long walk down Borrowdale next weekend, school- children free!

Anyway, it's 9pm, so I am off to bed. I know hoe to live it up on a Saturday night. :-)

Goodnight my dear friends.

Friday, 31 August 2012

Where I left off..

It's been quite a while since I did a blog post. I've been really busy and not had much time to think about what to write.
Suddenly I realised its September again tomorrow. Can't believe it, the time just seems to leap by in big chunks!

I have done some lovely things this year, seen some fabulous places, met some really nice people.   I suppose it's been a very good year.
Highlights have included the Olympics, of course, trips to France, Jersey and Denmark.
But I think my favourite was the little camping trip with Archie! Spending a night under canvas with a little fury hot water bottle snuggled up beside me, listening to the night sounds outside, was just so special.

He's such a loyal companion; loves me unconditionally and never asks for anything in return, other than a nice walk. His tail wags constantly, he smiles all the time and the welcome I get when I come home from work is worth a million pounds.

Short blog post this to get me back into it again! Early start tomorrow, to get my little man out for his walk before I go down to the pencil museum to man our c-art exhibition from 10 till 5.

Another busy day ahead!

Wednesday, 15 August 2012

Time

I don't seem to have enough time these days. Time that is to do nothing!

In my efforts to keep myself busy leaving no time to think or feel sorry for my silly self, I seem to have taken on so much that I'm in a constant state of diary watching. Which day is it and what am I doing today, kind of thing.

Good in many ways in that I've achieved what I wanted - no thinking time. But now I find I haven't got a free weekend until mid November!
And I wanted to get more cycling in before the nights are too dark.
Very busy this week sorting out the ukcps exhibition entries. Sending out emails, notifications, invites, etc. also folding and packing newsletters for posting to all the members.
Trouble with volunteering for things like that is that it has to be fitted in around everything else. Not all of the members realise that all the work done is voluntary and get a little impatient for information.

I need to try and do some drawing or painting too, as I have some exhibitions coming up, but I doubt I'll have the time to do enough new stuff. Will have to dredge up some older work!

Anyway, the result of all the stuff I'm doing is that I'm flipping tired. After the Olympic stint, then headlong into all the other stuff, I have the 26 mile 3 peaks walk on Sunday. Then a trip to jersey next week, then on my return the exhibitions, Shakespeare workshops, choirs, etc etc.

Being tired doesn't help the depression either, so I do find I get a bit more down than I should. But it shouldn't get too bad as I don't have the time to let it.
The only thing is I could really use a hug. In the absence of anybody to hug though, I'll just keep
  busy....


By the way, I was featured in the company blog this week. Here is a link to it. I think it's a bit soppy now reading it back, but hey ho!